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Atul Gawande's book Being Mortal is a thoughtful and well researched review of how we treat our ill, elderly and dying. He suggests 5 questions to ask all patients as an opening discussion
Asking these allows everybody to understand what the goal really is — what are you really fighting for? It’s for a life that contains certain things.
References
Gawande, A. (2014). Being mortal : medicine and what matters in the end / Atul Gawande: Medicine and what matters in the end / Atul Gawande (First edition.). New York: Metropolitan Books : Henry Holt & Company.